The Casual Cynic

Monday, November 03, 2003

The Verdict is In
The Casual Cynic

If you ever have the oportunity to mash the pedal to the metal of a brand new Corvette take it, but make sure there is no driving pro preventing you from turning off the traction control. Yesterday I had the opportunity to take advantage of an invitation to check out, free of charge, the majority of GM's automotive lineup as well as some of the competition. This was all part of the Auto Show in Motion promotion they are doing. While I was able to test numerous cars, the track and time limitations prevented me from really seeing what they could do. However here is a list of some first impressions I came home with.

Chevrolet Silveraldo SS Great feel for a truck. Liked the black on white gauges and hint of a slightly tuned exhaust. Took the 25 mph max course like a pro. Verdict: would like another shot at a test drive.

Chevy Trailblazer It was like climbing into a cookie box. There was nothing to catch my eye, and the lack of any real ammenities in the cabin did not justify the $35G price tag whatsoever. From what I could tell on the course, the handling was nothing to get excited about. Verdict: probably the most disappointing drive of the day.

Chevy Monte Carlo SS Here is a car I could drive for a while. It's amazingly comfortable interior (even the back) made this the road trip car of choice (except perhaps the Cadillac but we'll get to that.) Performed very well at 30 mph and got there in a hurry. Verdict: Could handle driving this again.

Chevrolet Corvette Definitely the longest wait of the day, but it was entertaining watching everybody mis-shift the poor cars. They had several Z06's, a convertible, some coupes, and several anniversary edition corvettes available. My luck of the draw was the coupe. There was no limit to how fast you could drive except the sarcastic cheering when a wannabe driver arrived back from taking out some cones. The only limit was the traction control. That was huge. I couldn't even get a chirp when I mashed it, but it did allow me to accelerate pretty quickly. I must say I was a bit disappointed in its performance. I took it to the edge around the corners and while it was impressive, it wasn't amazing. The engine is a work of art, beautifully balanced and mean as anything. The cabin was quite cozy and it let you know it wasn't your moms minivan, but I think it was Cake that sang about stick shifts and bucket seats... Verdict: Still a very cool car in my mind. If only I hadn't gone to LU. I could have bought two.

Caldillac SRX This was one of the biggest surprises of the day. I liked it. Due to its almost wagon size, it didn't feel like a SUV. I think it will avoid the stigma of the SUV that could go off road but never will. This is not a truck. What really impressed me was the spaciousness of the interior. There was plenty of glass all around, and the sunroof extended all the way back to the rear seats. In that respect it would be a perfect safari vehicle if it were a Land Cruiser instead of a Cadillac. It handled pretty well, and the ride was nice and smooth, but not too soft. Verdict: If I had a family and $40G, this would be one of my first picks.

Still to come...

Pontiac Grand Prix GTP
The SAAB story
Dodge Ram 1500 (yeah it had a hemi)
Cadillac XLR impression
Mercedes Benz C-series and,
Oh yeah, the H2

posted by Jonathan 10:08 AM

Friday, October 03, 2003

Hey Loser, Come To LeTourneau
The Casual Cynic

While flipping through the latest edition of Sports Illustrated I came across something that looked vaguely familier. It was the LeTouneau bell tower. Then I read the ad. In big, bold lettering,

"Your Dreams.
Chances are they won't come true in the big leaugues. Better be prepared."

Then it said something about getting a degree at any of its many campuses.

LeTourneau. The home for losers and failures the country over. What kind of marketing is that?

posted by Jonathan 5:14 PM

Thursday, March 27, 2003

Lady Wisdom Gives a Dinner Party
The Casual Cynic

I have spent the past couple of weeks trying something new. A friend gave me a copy of the Message this past Christmas, and I have been reading its version of the Proverbs. I found them to be very amusing and at the same time quite effective. It was like reading a letter from my Grandfather. They are very down to earth and express the truths in an incredibly matter-of-fact way. While I would not delve too deaply into theology with this book, it is interesting what a little rearrangment of style does. Here are some of my more amusing favorites.

On work:

Make hay while the sun shines - that's smart; go fishing during harvest - that's stupid.

On wealth:

The rich can be sued for everything they have - but the poor are free of such threats.

Banks foreclose on the farms of the poor, or else the poor lose their shirts to crooked lawyers.

On wisdom and the fool:

The wise accumulate wisdom; fools get stupider by the day.

Knowledge flows like spring water from the wise; fools are leaky faucets, dripping nonsense.

A quiet rebuke to a person of good sense does more than a whack on the head of a fool.

The words of a fool start fights; do him a favor and gag him.

And finally:

To ask a moron to quote a proverb is like putting a scalpel in the hands of a drunk.

posted by Jonathan 5:04 PM

Tuesday, March 04, 2003

Captive Across Texas
The Casual Cynic

I spent the weekend, and much of the past week for that matter, traveling around the state of Texas. Most of it was done from a sterile veiwpoint of thousands of feet above the landscape, but this weekend I had the chance to traverse the countryside the old way. I drove. There is much to be seen and heard on a trip to the southern portion of the state. The trip to San Antonio did much to reinforce the notion that Texas is an entity all of its own. Perhaps the most persuasive argument for this conclusion is the sounds that can be heard across the airwaves.

I grew tired of my selection of CDs and decided to try something I hadn't done in a while. Timidly I punched the "scan" button on my radio. First there was nothing but the standard worn-out, classic rock and whining country music coming out of my speakers. Then there was something that caught my ear. Something I had never heard before. I listened wondering what in the world was going on. How can someone write something so spastic, so unusual, so ... "interesting." The song finished and the DJ explained that his station, 104.something - "The Ranch," played the very best in...Big Band, Western, Swing. Wow. This was definitely a new experience. I decided to stick around and check out this mutation of music, and found myself questioning, "If you're so smart, how come you ain't rich." It sounded like Marty Robbins suddenly woke up wearing a zuet suite and playing a tombone. The selection was followed by the financial advise, "You gotta sell them chickens (before they die, and the eggs before they hatch." I didn't know what to do. Should I break out in a swing move or a two step. Fortunately I was strapped to my seat and the steering wheel kept me from getting to crazy, and I had to settle on pointing at the stereo and laughing like Nelson, the bully on the Simpsons. It made me want to find a hip holster for my tommy gun. It was like flagpole sitting at a rodeo. It was crazy. It entertained all the way from Corsicana to Temple. Texas truely is a state like no other.
posted by Jonathan 12:30 PM

Wednesday, February 26, 2003

The Columbia Tragedy, and the explosion that preceded it.
The Casual Cynic

Columbia. Columbia. Columbia. Columbia...Has the entire bandwidth of the nation been taken over by the Columbia. I am forced to retreat into my cave to avoid the sensationalism the Hype-Doctors have spun on this story. But only to avoid the secondary tragedy that always follows. The tragedy caused by callously commercializing the event in order to maintain ratings. We listen to ourselves talk about circumstances we have no understanding of, project our theories on events we have no knowlege of, and look painfully foolish in the process. A terrorist attack? GOOD GRIEF. Do you have a brain? Conducting natinonal interviews with family members even while pieces of debris were still falling on overhead? How tasteless can you get? Posting pieces of that debris on e-bay? You deserve to be shot.

It shocked me to hear the news. It stunned me to see the footage. It flashed back memories of a six year old boy glued to the television watching the Challenger explode over and over again while trying to comprehend, as only a kindergartener can, the importance of the image being shown. The tragedy made an impact then on a kid dreaming big dreams of science and exploration, and the fresh one makes an impact today on a bigger kid still dreaming big. It is staggering to see the power of the technology we have, and how terrible the consequences of the inevitable inability to contain its power.

Please don't create another tragedy. Don't let the significance of what happened become a casualty of the war of sensationalism. Don’t use the situation to get a leg up on proving who has the loudest mouth, the most eloquent way to sell a story, the most convincing “I told you so.” And please, please, please, don’t write a song about it.
posted by Jonathan 3:21 PM

Forces of Habit
Rants and Delusions

I am a creature of habit. I spend massive amounts of time and effort developing these habits until they become instinctive thought patterns. In the world of aviation this is a positive thing. Critical situations require instantaneous action that can only come as a result of automatic response. Methodical action and an affinity toward the routine forced its way into my life. Why is it that, within a city infrastructure with so many ways to get from point A to point B, one street becomes the sacred route? No one way is necessarily more suited than the other, only more natural.

How far does this obsession with familiarity dig its claws? How deeply rooted are my attachments to tradition. Am I capable of an original thought, a unique opinion, or am I forced to assimilate the actions of those around me, engraining them as my own. When does habit become detrimental? When is repetition merely a monotonous hum-drum lifestyle. Even “thinking outside the box,” and “bucking the system,” can become merely a reactive process that is done because one is a “free-thinker.” Is not automatic opposition the same as instant acceptance? Hum...
posted by Jonathan 3:17 PM